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January 31, 2021

 

Happy 2021 Powerful Family!

 

I’m screaming FREEDOM!!!!

 (Hoodies & T-Shirts at awisebrown.com click shop)

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I’m so excited to see you here in the new year of 2021! Last year was challenging, however we made it. Repeat after me, “WE MADE IT”!

 

2020 was extremely stressful, it was full of despair, fear, uncertainty, darkness and lessons. Although, many also experienced clarity, strength, wisdom, new connections, financial gain, grounding, new homes and babies, which are all to be celebrated!

 

As a Psychotherapist who is spiritual and practices therapy using a holistic and integrative approach focusing on family of origin trauma, I practice what I teach. At the end of 2020, I had to take a break! I realized that I wasn’t taking care of myself the way that I needed to.

 

As we were shut down, I continued to work, I never stopped seeing clients. I felt the need to offer support and coping skills to everyone who needed it during such a dark time. I did radio, television and zoom interviews. I feel the energy that surrounds me intensely. I felt the energy of those who were suffering from loss, grief, the fear of uncertainty, anxiety, depression, relationship distress, then the energy of black people and white people who watched George Floyd’s murder and didn’t know how to respond to their feelings. That was exhausting, in addition to always feel stressed to explain how “Black Lives Matter” while loving the movement because it represents me and my struggle as a black woman with a black father, mother, sister, brother, cousins, husband and children. I also worked nonstop taking care of my family by having long intense enlightening conversations, overeating, cleaning and cooking 2-3 meals daily which I’ve never cooked 2-3 meals daily for the past 25 years that I have been married. Although I LOVED every minute of all of this, because I truly enjoy empowering others and connecting deeply, I realized in December that I was taking care of everyone else but neglecting ME! I needed Freedom!

 

In May God told my spirit (a thought I receive after exercise, meditation, prayer or dreams) that I should take a road trip to visit my mother in New Jersey. Now to someone else this may be a small ask, but for me this was big and unusual because I don’t like road trips at all. I don’t like the feeling of being stuck in a car for a long period of time, where I’m unable to be where I want to be when I want to be there, you get what I’m getting at. Which is why I was ignoring the thought and feeling when it came up until it came up again in December.

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In December after being overworked and unfulfilled. After taking an on-line “Alive OS” class and testing positive for Covid-19 in November while being extremely careful and responsible, almost obsessive, I realized that I needed to do something that was unordinary. Something that I had never done before. I decided that I was going to take the road trip from Texas to New Jersey to see my mother. The thought would continue to visit me often. I mentioned this idea to my husband and my daughter. My daughter said, “let’s do it since I have a long break from law school, I’m in”, but my husband said, “no let’ s fly, it’s too far to drive, and I already know, I’ll be the one doing the driving while you’re asleep”. We all laughed because that would usually be what would happen, but this was a different type of trip, this was a trip for my personal growth. This was an unusual attempt to take care of my needs, I needed to FREE myself!

 

That was it! I decided that in 5 days we were on or way to Jersey. My daughter and I began planning. We took our Covid tests, I booked our SUV, packed our "feel good" snacks, my favorite Gucci boots, sneakers, Juicy sweatsuits and comfortable “mental health is a lifestyle” hoodies (all 3). My daughter began to research all of the places that we were curious about visiting so that we had the option to visit if we felt like it. We stopped everywhere we wanted to while maintaining our plan to stay corona free. It was scary while pausing for gas in small towns where they could care less about wearing mask to stop the spread of covid, or about 2 black girls alone on their journey for freedom. We were smart , we knew how to maneuver and drive the speed limit. A few places that we visited were the newly built, “Virgin Hotel” for a night stay, “Hatties” hot chicken in Nashville Tennessee, Dolly Parton’s new rooftop hotel and Meharry Medical College (HBCU). We were both open to do anything and everything that each of us wanted to do on our ride. We had no expectations nor thoughts of limitations, it was beautiful. This was the first time that I did not care about the end goal, the destination or getting there by a specific time. We were FREE, present at every single moment and mile of the journey. We saw people, places and things that we had never seen, we laughed, danced, sang, and had shallow and deep conversations about everything.

 

We arrived at my mother’s house 2 days later with feelings of pride, accomplishment, joy and FREEDOM! As I pulled into the driveway at 1:30 am, to my surprise, my daughter had our favorite song cued up and it began to play loudly. I looked at her feeling so proud of both of us for not allowing fear of the unknown and judgement of prior circumstances to stop us from following our GUT (the GOD in us). With tears in my eyes, we cranked the volume all the way up and DANCED, hugged, DANCED, hugged, DANCED and hugged each other tightly. We woke the neighborhood! (lol).

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I share this with you my POWERFUL Family, because I want you to choose to follow your heart’s desires which will grant you a sense of peace and FREEDOM. It's your birthright to be FREE! I'm assuming you are familiar with the saying, "follow your gut". Please do so because it is the road to your personal freedom. I was so caught up into trying to serve my purpose for others that I forgot about my purpose to serve myself first. I ignored God's whisper until I couldn't any longer. 2020 taught us a lot about others but I’m hoping that it also taught you a lot about yourselves. What I know for sure is GOD always knows what you need and is always conspiring for your good. When HE whispers through your GUT, listen. We often miss the messages because we get distracted by the messages from the outside; from dysfunctional cycles, fear, friends, family, the need to please and achieve, etc. These messages from the outside are usually rooted in fear so they can be destructive, yet the messages from inside are real, honest and rooted in LOVE so trusting them can lead to FREEDOM!!!!!

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Join me on this FREEDOM journey and find your PEACE. You can  purchase your hoodies and or t-shirts on awisebrown.com, click "shop".

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LOVE,

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Andrea

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